And The Winner Is...Not Here!

Saturday wasn't a great day, not by a long shot. But, as I sat in the lounge, waiting with bated breath, for the start of the 4th Annual South African Film & Television Awards, oblivious to the fact that I'd be bitterly disappointed before the end of the night, I began to realize that there was only a slim chance that my day would improve. Man Utd had just lost 3-1 to Everton and Chiefs and Pirates had just played another dull, goalless draw (deja vu? Cuz I feel like this has happened before...)

The show started well enough with the usual song and dance, and I was pretty impressed with the host (I forgot his name); I pretty sure he's comedian and I once saw him in one of Engen's Proudly South African ads of welcoming tourists to Mzansi. He was quite hilarious but at times you did get the feeling that he was trying too hard.

I'll be honest, I didn't know most of the nominees but the nominations were generally dominated by SABC-produced shows. I was very surprised to see that some shows which have been off-air for more that 12 months were nominated; shouldn't they have been nominated at last year's ceremony? Anyway, the performances sucked big time...I have nothing against Just Jinger or MXO, I just think the performances were a bit low-key. Granted, the organizers did what the had to do but overall, they were left still wanting.

For starters, the aisles between the seats were too narrow, so much so that when winners stood up to fetch their awards, it almost impossible to negotiate their way past their neighbours. Another thing that perturbed me greatly was the number of nominees who were absent from the ceremony. Personally, I think it should be mandatory for nominees to attend awards shows in which they may take part in. AND, I think there should be penalties incurred if anyone goes AWOL without a valid explanation. These awards are supposed to be the most important film awards in the country but people just don't have enough respect for them.

And then there were the people who presented the awards...can't these people read? Last year, I heard that Zimbabwe's literacy rate was higher than ours - I thought it was a load of crap, but now...Pabi Moloi made Zenzo Nqobe look like an idiot on stage; at one point, she even pointed it out to him that it was his cue! Dude can't even read in own name from a prompter, cuz I think they write your name before any lines that you're supposed to read? I don't know...but it didn't look good. Quite surprising cuz the dude can read scripts since he was in Tsotsi and I think I saw a glimpse of him in Blood Diamond, plus he reads scripts everyday for Rhythm City, so I guess it was just nervousness creeping in. Speaking of nervousness, that kid from from Hectic 99 was so nervous, the envelope was shaking in hand - kinda strange given that he hosts a 'live' show every afternoon...

I guess District 9 wasn't released in time for the nominations? Anyway, the nominees in the Best Film category were completely new to me; I had never seen or heard of such movies, well, save for White Wedding. Which reminds me, I think they should expand the number of nominees from 3 to 5 for more competition and a little more work for the SAFTA committee. I seriously hope that this year's SAMA awards improve a bit - we all know how I feel about them. Hey, when are the Metro FM Music Awards happening? It's been a long while...


By Zane Urbane

Nuff Said

So the Grammies can and went...Beyonce took an impressive 6 awards, Jay-Z took 3 and Eminem took 2. AND, Eminem finally got what he wanted. A few years ago, he said he just wanted a 10th Grammy to add to his mantelpiece, and now, he has 11, good for him. Great for Jay, winning two Grammies for Run This Town and Best Rap Song for D.O.A, which I think, thoroughly deserved it.

And then there was the performance every rap fan is talking about. I'm still yet to see it, can't wait - it's a pity I don't have DSTV at home, but no worries, I'll just have to get it from someone who has (hopefully) recorded it. I heard the overall performance was amazing. Eminem, Lil' Wayne, Drake, and Travis Barker (who replaced Kanye West on "Forever" cuz 'Ye was probably banned from attending the show) lit up the stage, although those watching at home got a lot of beeps cuz CBS censored each and every swear word.

So, 50 Cent finally got a Grammy via Eminem's Crack A Bottle! It seems 50 can't really "crack" it at award shows. Quite frankly, I don't remember him winning anything, ever. And it's a great injustice cuz I honestly think Get Rich Or Die Tryin' should have won something besides critical acclaim and commercial success. Been listening to Before I Self-Destruct...NOT! Apart from the menacing "Pscho" featuring Shady and "So Disrespectful", I haven't really listened to the other songs...gotta try this weekend.

While on that commercial success note, people are already saying that Weezy's experimental Rock album, Rebirth will only move about 150k units in the first week, a far cry from the dizzy heights of 1.3 million first week sales of its predecessor, The Carter III. I've seen the official tracklist, and I must say, I'm not overly impressed. Apart from the obvious stand-out track, Drop The World, which features Eminem, I fail to see anything worthy of note. But, I won't lambaste it just yet. I'll have to listen to the album to make my final decision. Personally, I think he could've featured a couple of indie Rock bands for a bit of variety, but as I said, I'll have to listen to it first.

Now, on the local front, HHP released a perfume some time ago. I have this to get this off my chest, I like Motswako, really, I do, but I don't like listening to HHP. I don't know what the big deal's anyway, I'd much rather listen to Morafe, Khuli Chana from Morafe in particular, cuz I think he's a Motswako rapper who deserves a lot of recognition. Although, I can't hear what most of these guys are saying, it doesn't matter what language a rapper uses, an average is the same in every language, and that's what I think HHP is, an average rapper. Can't believe the dude has a perfume...his earlier stuff was great, then he got a good record deal. Is it just me or is it a FACT that starving rappers make better music?

I don't believe this, our esteemed President was promoting polygamy at the World Economic Forum! This is fucking embarassing, man! Needless to say, I'm completely against multiple partners, sanctioned by culture or not, I don't really give a fuck. I still think it's bullshit that someone as important an the President of the country could do something like this. Three wives? All this after scraping through a rape trial to be acquitted of the charges? I don't know anymore...
Besides, I don't think it's possible to love three women at the same time. But, wait, maybe love has nothing to do with it; it's about power, it always has. If you were to look at a cross-section of any culture in South Africa, you'd probably notice that men have all the power to do anything they want, in the name of culture. Culture, it's like a pretext for anything that isn't exactly above-board. But, hey, what do I know, my dad is FOR polygamy...

By Zane Urbane